Kutheni abantu amanga: Feel Dr. Lightman

Njengoko bathanda esithi hero enye thotho ithandwayo minyaka ilishumi idlulileyo, i ugqirha lukhuni Gregory House - "Wonke ubuxoki." Yinyaniso le? Iinkcukacha-manani zibonisa ukuba nkqu nabantu abaninzi ngokunyaniseka evulekileyo wambi ndithi inyaniso kwabanye. Kutheni abantu amanga , kwaye utsalo naye kuyo?

Kutheni?

Kukho izizathu ezininzi ezingundoqo ukuba umntu teke ukuba ukumela imeko yokwenene a imibala eyahlukileyo ngokupheleleyo okanye abusithelise izibakala ezithile. Amaninzi umntu elele, xa:

• esoyika ukuphoxa okanye buhlungu umntu, nto leyo kujongwe le okanye nayiphi na enye ingcaciso;
• uloyiko lokuba kuza amgxeke okanye ugwetyiwe, akafuni ukuba ohlwaywe ngenxa naliphi na ityala lakhe (kanye njengomntwana, ewe :));
• Ifuna ukubonisa ngokwalo kwi okusemandleni alo, kunokuba ngempela.

Okunye inqabile, kodwa isizathu zokuba umntu elele, inokuba ngqondweni elungileyo kunye nokungakwazi ukwahlula liphupha abakuso.

Indlela yokubona?

Malunga ingqalelo amanga Iziboniso non-ngomlomo (ulwimi lomzimba, izijekulo, njl) libhaliwe, wathi sele kakhulu. Noko ke, singasathethi bachatshazelwa yi isihloko ukuqonda indlela ntoni na umntu lowo wengcibi yokuluka, kwintetho yakhe. Ukanti, ukuba ulahlekelwa emehlweni naluphi uphawu non-ngomlomo, indlela umntu uyathetha, uya kukwazi ukuhlalutya nangayiphi na indlela.

1. Buza imibuzo. Njengoko jikelele ngakumbi, abantu alalanayo ukuba ingqalelo izinto abazithethayo, kodwa hayi indlela. Ngoko ke, kusenokwenzeka ukuba umntu lowo, ngaphandle bengaboni, ukuba aphendule umbuzo wakho ngamazwi ezibe zithethwa kwakho imizuzwana embalwa edlulileyo. Umzekelo, ukuba ubuze, "Ngaba ukuba waphule ikhompyutha?" Kwaye uya kuva ukuphendula kwinto efana ne, "Hayi, andizange ezophule ikhompyutha" - yenye imiqondiso yokuqala phambi kwakho ulixoki.

2. Amaxesha amaninzi amanga ubhaqo yenzelwa phezu isantya nemvakalozwi yokuthetha. Le ndoda, kwanyanzeleka ukuba aye ukuza ingcaciso, uya kuthetha kancinci kancinci ngakumbi kunesiqhelo. Ukuba uthe waba ixesha ukuza i "ubungqina bokuba kwenye indawo kommangalelwa ngexesha lesenzo esithile", ngoko kunokwenzeka, kuya kuba ngokukhawuleza kancinci (kakade, kufuneka ukuba ixesha lokuthetha into phambi kokuba ndilibele!). Xa umntu elele, kunjalo nje zifakwe kwi-akhawunti yakhe inani elikhulu iinkcukacha ezincinane engabalulekanga.

3. ikhefu elide kwintetho kunye nezivakalisi ngokwegrama ayilunganga, ngokufuthi uphinda - omnye umqondiso amanga.

4. Ukuba awuyitshintshanga le sifundo, kwaye interlocutor ziye luxhaswe oku kakhulu yakhululeka - kungoko umxholo endala mnandi kuye. Kusenokwenzeka ukuba uye weva ilizwi olunye inyaniso ngaye.

5. Zama ukucela interlocutor ukuchaza iziganeko ukuze reverse. Ukuba umntu uthetha inyaniso, kulula ukuyenza loo nto. Kodwa ke ixoki iya kuqalisa yokulahleka kunye uphaphazele.

endaweni yokuba UYobi

Siyifumene izizathu eziphambili zokuba umntu elele, kwakunye neendlela ezininzi ukuvavanya olwenu interlocutor yakhe. A enkulu imali ulwazi malunga ubuxoki obubonakala yayo yonke, njl lungafumaneka kwi web - zama ukujonga izinto ngendlela esinomdla isihloko ezifana kunegrafu ubuxoki le.

Nangona kunjalo, ukuze nibe neze ukufumanisa ukuba kutheni umntu elele, kwaye ndicinga indlela ukujongana nale - zama ukwenza lusoloko ukuba qotho nabanye. "Njengokuba umnxeba, ngoko intlokoma" - musa ukulibala le nyaniso!