Indlela ukunxibelelana umntwana wakho? Gippenreiter Yu, unjingalwazi le Moscow State University of Psychology, ethetha ngale kwincwadi yakhe ethi,

Indlela ukunxibelelana umntwana, Gippenreiter yb Yena utyhila amaphepha incwadi yakhe, nto leyo eye waphumelela udumo nabazali kulo lonke ihlabathi.

Ikakhulu xa kukho umntwana kukwamkelwa olungenamiqathango kwemibandela, uthando non-ezigwebayo. Kuyinto inemiqathango, oko kukuthi, "Kanye ke", ukuba kunjalo, yintoni na kuphela ngenxa yokuba kukho. Ukufunda ukunxibelelana ukusuka kwindawo Ngenxa onothando nokwamkela umzali, hayi bacaphuka kwaye bavakalise amabango ukunceda ukufumana isisombululo, ngaphandle ngokucinezela phezu usana, funda ukuze athwale uxanduva neziphumo ezi zinto Gippenreiter Yu.

Ngokutsho umbhali, evakalisa ukunganeliseki kunye naziphi na izenzo zomntwana, nixoxe uligxeke kuphela izenzo kunye nezenzo, kwakunye neziphumo zazo, kodwa kunjalo, hayi umntwana. Kwaye qiniseka ukuba baqwalasele into yokuba isenzo wayo kuphoxa kuwe, kodwa iye alichatshazelwa ubudlelwane wakho umntwana, kodwa kangakanani kabi kuphela. ie nokuba esola izenzo umntwana, siya kumnika ukuba siqonde ukuba isabalulekile kwaye ezixabisekileyo kuthi kuye, utsho Julia Gippenreiter. Nxibelelana kunye nomntwana kufuneka bahlale uxoxe yonke into anomdla kuthetha naye nawuphi na isihloko, ngokuphandle nangokufihlakeleyo. Noko ke, akusoloko ilungele oko, kungekuphela nje umntwana kodwa umzali.

Mamela ukuva

Ngoko njani ukunxibelelana umntwana wakho? Gippenreiter yb icebisa bagqwese ubuchule "zokuphulaphula esebenzayo", nto leyo evumela ukuba ukuzama ukuqhagamshelana naye yaye ukubonisa ukuba iingxaki zayo kufutshane kuwe, ukuba uyakuqonda yaye ayabavela. Iinkcukacha uchazwe kwincwadi Yu Gippenreiter "Ukujongana sana. Indlela "Ngokutsho umbhali, ilungelo ukwakha incoko wabeka usana kwi ingxoxo -? Amanyathelo okuqala ekusombululeni ingxaki.

Enye msebenzi, nto leyo evumela ukuba isigqibo sokuba ukujongana umntwana, Gippenreiter yb Ubiza indlela "I - imiyalezo". Ndiwusebenzisa ukubonakalisa isimo sabo, ukuba izimvo zabo malunga imeko yongquzulwano lwangoku, angavumeli uvavanyo yezenzo le interlocutor. Umzekelo "I - imiyalezo" ikwindawo yebinzana "Mna kudana kakhulu kuba ingxabano yanamhlanje" endaweni. "Nawe - imiyalezo" "Wena baziphatha ngokwamasikizi, kwaye wacaphuka" "I - imiyalezo", ngokutsho umbhali, musa ukubiza, kodwa ukuveza isimo sakho yesehlo kuphela, kubalulekile ukuthetha naye nabani na, makhe yedwa umntwana, elivisayo. Ngenxa yale ndlela yonxibelelwano awehlelwa ukusuka ukuzithemba umntwana, ayikuchukumisi bakhe ukuzithemba kwaye akukho indlela yokuzikhusela ezimbi.

Theory kanye umkhuba

Nendlela yokukhuthaza umntwana ukuba enze nantoni na, ukuze zongamele ukuxhathisa, ngaphandle kokwaphula nto kwaye squashing igunya labazali, ukufumana indlela ulwimi kunye elivisayo "kunzima", ukoyisa wedwa kunye bodwa? Le ncwadi iqulethe inqwaba iincam eziluncedo kunye namabali obomi ebonisa ngesisombululo kwiimeko ezininzi ekuso. Emva kwecandelo ngalinye ekhaya yokwamkela igqibeleleyo yonxibelelwano. Ukwenza kwabo ukuphuhlisa izenzo noku zifumanela kwakhona memory lane ngexesha elifanelekileyo.

On lo mbuzo: "Indlela ukunxibelelana umntwana wakho 'Gippenreiter yb hayi unika kuphela impendulo echanekileyo. Yena ebonisa ukucinga, ukuba ulime, ukuze uqonde, ukuze bafunde ukucinga ngaphandle kwebhokisi, umthabathe umntwana ke kuqala onke khumbula ukuba wayebathanda, abantu lweenkobe kunye ngamabona dear kuwe.